How to Find Your Fertility Team

When you’re trying to conceive, the people you surround yourself with matter. The right fertility team can make the journey feel clear and supported, while the wrong fit can leave you stressed, confused, and stuck in the same cycle. In this episode of Fertility Conversations with Jaya, you’ll hear how to choose the best team for your needs, what red flags to watch for, and why involving your partner from the start is non-negotiable.

Why Your Team Matters

Welcome back to the Fertility Podcast. Today I am talking to you about how to find your team. Sounds simple. It’s not so simple, and it’s actually what I spend a lot of my time helping my one to one patients navigate because it’s a big deal.

I think that if you do not have the right team behind you and you don’t get it right, it can add on months, years to your fertility journey. It can also increase your stress and make it that much harder.

So I’m going to explain how to find your perfect team, how to know if they’re the right fit for you, and the things that you need to be really looking for when you do this. Because this is the foundational work.

Getting the right team behind you is so important because they’re not just helping you on the journey that’s right for you, they’re also supporting you in the way that you need to be supported. And honestly, that looks different for everyone.

The Right Doctor Isn’t Always the Obvious Choice

The right doctor for you might not be the person that has the best Instagram following, the prettiest clinic, or who your best friend recommended.

Quite often we doctor shop and pick our team based on who someone at work saw and had a good result with, or even just going to your GP and being referred to a fertility specialist they know. But it’s actually a lot more nuanced than that.

You’re unique and so are your needs in terms of fertility. Your friend that had a great result with one doctor might have had a completely different story.

Different Specialists, Different Approaches

Fertility specialists have different takes on fertility. Some are conservative, some are willing to try new things. Some only practice evidence-based medicine, while others are open to upcoming approaches.

Their beliefs and personalities matter too. How you feel about your specialist and how you connect with them is important. If you don’t have good communication and trust, then honestly, you’re doomed from day one. You need to feel like, “They’ve got me. They have my best interests and they’re really thinking about what my needs are.”

The same goes for your naturopath, nutritionist, and acupuncturist.

Avoiding Conflicting Advice

One of the biggest problems I see is people sitting in the middle of their team. The acupuncturist is saying one thing, the nutritionist another, and the doctor something completely different. You’re left confused, overwhelmed, and anxious — wondering, “What do I do now?”

The perfect team talks together and supports you as one. This is what I encourage all the couples I work with to do: find the right team and make sure they’re communicating.

Natural vs. Medical: Finding Where You Sit

Just because you’re seeing someone who specializes in fertility doesn’t mean they’re all doing the same thing. It’s important to understand where you sit on the spectrum of natural and medical.

Personally, I sit in the middle between natural and conventional medicine. I love aspects of both. With my clients, I help navigate both worlds and ask, “How can we get the best of both?”

I also take emotional stretch into account. Do you feel like you’ve got three months before you lose your mind, or six months? How much preparation do you want? This all shapes the plan.

Some people want everything to be natural, no matter how long it takes. I’m not the perfect person for that, and that’s okay. Others are type A, open to natural approaches but not opposed to medical support — that’s where I work best.

On the other end, if you want to go completely medical, find the doctor who supports that. It’s not about judgment. It’s about finding people who share your values.

Preparation Comes First

When you’re building your team, start with someone who can help with functional testing and the natural side of preparation — a nutritionist, naturopath, or fertility acupuncturist.

If you just go to your GP or fertility specialist, the testing is often more limited. Spending three to six months in preparation — lifestyle, supplements, testing — before seeing your fertility specialist can make a massive difference.

I often see people who’ve gone straight to a specialist, then have to circle back to this work before trying again. The results are completely different once the groundwork is done.

Getting Your Team Talking Together

I write letters to doctors and other practitioners all the time. I explain what’s happening and what I think needs to happen — always respectfully, never overstepping.

When your team talks together, it’s not about one person being the “top dog.” It’s about respect. Each profession brings a toolkit, and together they create the perfect combination.

When that happens, you feel supported, the mental load drops, and you know your next steps.

Knowing When to Change Doctors

When people don’t have the right team, they often stay with a doctor they don’t align with — feeling unheard, unseen, and stuck in the same cycle. They’re scared to get a second opinion because it feels like starting again.

But it’s not starting again. Sometimes a fresh set of eyes is exactly what you need.

How Much Support Do You Need?

Everyone needs different levels of support. Some just want a plan and they’re fine. Others need a lot more.

That’s why I offer text and email support in my programs — so things don’t get delayed for weeks or months. For people who want to fast-track, it can turn an eight-month process into three or four months.

It’s not for everyone — it can feel overwhelming. But knowing what kind of support you need is important. And remember, you don’t have to settle if it doesn’t feel right.

First Consultations: Trust Your Gut

Your first consultation is as much about you interviewing them as the other way around. If you don’t vibe, don’t go back. Try someone else.

You’ll know when it’s right: you leave the consult breathing easier, feeling excited, and thinking, “I feel so good about this. I’m excited for the next steps.” That’s a good sign.

Don’t Forget the Partner

If your practitioners are only focusing on you and not your partner, that’s a red flag. Male factor infertility is real.

In heterosexual couples, I always treat both partners at the same time. He needs to be on a plan too — testing, supplements, lifestyle changes. He’s 50% of the equation.

Not only does that improve results, it also makes you feel like you’re in it together. You’re not the only one carrying everything.

Recap

• Find a doctor you like and who specializes in your area of need (endo, miscarriage, over 40, male factor infertility, etc.)
• Ask questions and see how open they are to real conversations
• Make sure your team communicates with each other
• Choose the level of support that matches your needs
• Don’t feel ashamed about where you sit on the natural–medical spectrum
• Include your partner from the start

Knowing where you sit and finding someone who aligns with that creates the perfect relationship — one that helps you progress faster.

Okay, I’m going to wrap that up there. Thanks for listening and I’ll see you in the next episode.